Sometimes I really want my life to be a little filmy. Everybody singing and dancing during weddings and get-togethers, melody duets being played during romantic times, sad senti songs being the BGM for senti times. (Btw I also like this old Bollywood trick- one song and the hero and the heroine get married, have their honeymoon and they have kids and they too grow up- wish our life was such an uncomplicated one). But more than anything else I just wanna learn how to disappear just like in films. Remember, in old films the heros used to vanish just like that from their prying sasumas, chachajis. If only I could learn that trick...here I'm just listing a few of my desperate moments where I just wanted to run away or vanish from there.
*** Where & When: Every Marriages I go. I am taking a reference of my college times
One lady comes upto me and ask,
She: How are you related to the bride?
Me: I am her xxx.
She: Oh!! Are you studying??
Me: Yeah Engineering..(Now getting an idea of who she is..)
She: Where's your mother?
Me: Don't Know. Even I'm searching for her ( Now I really was searching for Amma)
She: She'll have your horoscope na?
Me: *What! you expect Amma to carry that in all weddings* (Now cursing all my cousins who deserted me )
She: Why are you wearing specs?
Me : *Duh Huh* Short sight *Should I run now or wait for someone to rescue me*
She: There's a guy....Blah blah...
Me: *No one's coming?? What excuse should I make???*
She: Blah Blah.... (turns her head in search for another eligible girl)
I swiftly withdraw myself from the place.
***Where and When : Interview at Rajagiri College
After a short intro of myself to two girls sitting on my either side, the one on right said
Righty: Hey I know that guy. He's my senior at College.
Me: Oh!!
Lefty: No way... He was in my batch at TIME.
Righty, Lefty:...Blah Blah...
Me(having no idea what they're talking) : *Think I should find a new seat*
Just then,
Lefty(to me): Hey you got a bag from TIME?
Me: Yeah, You didn't get any?
Lefty: No re. (To Righty) Hey you know that guy....blah blah..
Me: *that's it...I'm never going to like these Ekm Jadas*
Finally the conversation comes to MAT scores
Lefty(To Righty): How was your score?
Me: *Thank God! This is my area! I'm gonna dazzle you girls*
Righty: 94. You know I wasn't prepared at all.
Me: *Somebody ask me!! pls!!!*
Conversation is trying to go somewhere else.
Me (desperately ...To Lefty): What's your score?
Lefty: 95... Blah Blah
Me: *Ask me!!*
Blah Blah
Me: *Ask me!!*
Blah Blah..
Till the end of the day, Nobody asked me that question as I choked myself with my score.
***Where and When: I think it was during 8th grade. A Unit Test time
Prologue: I had this cousin as my classmate. Being the better of the two in academics, I always scored more marks in every unit test. But this time, the teacher in Social Studies gave us one essay to study for the test. All we had to do was to mug up. But then fate was it. A slight mistake in my answer.
Scene 1: Everyone in the class scored 35 out of 35, but for me and a few others who were adamant not to study the essay.
Scene 2: My aunty who never showed up to our house during exam times comes running. After a few other queries, she asked me how much I scored in Social Studies. I said, "34 ". She,"Oh!!! (my cousin) got 35, you know". Amma's face becomes red. Rest is history.
***Where & When: My regular Vignesh bus
A fat lady enters the bus with a similarly fat daughter. Seeing her not able to stand properly, I gave my seat to her. A few stops later, the lady next to our fat lady gets down. I, who has been standing near the seat, try to sit. The fat lady pushes me away(with her single finger!!) and reserves the seat for her daughter. Thats it, I thought. "I am never gonna help any other fat/old ladies". But its me na, I won't ever learn. I still embarrass myself by falling again and again into such situations.
*** Where & When : Interview table at Rajagiri College
Interviewer: What do you want to do after MBA?
Me: I firstly want to learn things practically by joining some firm. But my actual ambition is to be an entrepreneur *Entrepreneur , my foot!*
Intrvwr: Entrepreneur! Hmm.... What kind of company would you want to start?
Me: Since I have experience in Software, I would like to start a Software company. *Software is the last thing I want to do on earth*
PS:- R@ji chechi got married on jan 27th and her reception function was at Railway Kalyanamandapam, my dream place. And chechi, this joke is dedicated to you and jeeju.
What did chechi's sasuma ask her to bring as dowry?
Dher saara pyaar aur ek lambhi seedi. Get It?
Yeah, I know this is an old and copied, but this is so true with R@ji chechi and jeeju.
PSS:- Do you know what's the best part of me getting married? I can officially make jokes about it.
PSSS:- Do you know what is the one thing I couldn't take my eyes off from in the new Mile Sur? Ranbir's portion. His trousers are so transparent. If they couldn't afford a better pair of trousers, they could have adjusted by taking the video of only the upper half. At least I wouldn't get distracted na.
